Losing weight was a big thing for me – it is a big thing for anyone. I felt happier, healthier and just so much more confident.
What I wasn’t prepared for though, were the barrage of negative and patronising comments I received from primarily ‘friends’, work colleagues and random men.
When you lose weight, people just assume they can say whatever you want about your body. Honestly, it’s quite odd.
Why do they do it? I guess some people may see how much happier and more confident you are, and perhaps they feel threatened by it? Or maybe people are genuinely worried you’re going to lose ‘too much’ weight and go too far?! I don’t know. I just know I heard some bizarre things from people. I thought it would be interesting to list them all here!
It’s worth bearing in mind here that the majority of these comments were when I was still considered ‘overweight’ on the BMI scale. So I wasn’t ‘too skinny’ or anything.
“Wow, your boobs have completely disappeared haven’t they?!”
This comment was made to be on a couple of occasions from two female work colleagues. Yes, perhaps by boobs had shrunk – that’s what happens with weight loss. But why did they think it would be ok to comment on my cup size?! Very strange. I didn’t even know them very well.
“Be careful, you’re going to become ill soon. You’re wasting away.”
This comment was made to me by a woman I worked with, who again I had only spoken to like twice in my entire life. But she said this to me about four or five times – seriously. At this point, I had lost two stone and weighed 12 stone (168lbs) in total. Maybe she was genuinely worried about me – although she had no reason to be!
“I don’t want to be friends with you anymore.”
This was said by a girl friend who was the same age as me. She had been trying to lose weight for a little while and was struggling with it. One day, she just came up to me and said this straight out. Needless to say, I was a little taken aback. Weight loss really brings out your true friends!
“Hmm, I’d rate you an 8 out of 10 now.”
This was made to me by a gross guy I used to work with, who seemed to think it was his responsibility to rank women out of ten. He said my ranking had increased since I had lost weight, making me a solid eight. Why would I even care?! Go away weirdo.
“Don’t lose your bum.”
Again, a comment by a super pervy guy who I hardly knew. He said to me that it was great that I was losing weight, but I should keep my bum…Why did he think that he could dictate to me what I did with my own body? Very odd.
“Elle you are so thin! xxx”
This was a comment (once again) made by a work colleague on one of my Facebook photos. I hate it when people try to disguise negative comments as being ‘caring’ and ‘loving’, like with the kisses. I personally see ‘thin’ as a word with negative connotations. If you don’t have anything nice to say, then bugger off. Once again I was around 11 stone and a size 8 at this point, so not ‘thin’.
“Why are you even bothering, you don’t need to lose weight. You should stop now.”
I had lost two stone by this point so I was around the 12 stone mark. It was a comment from a friend at work. I think people don’t assume you are not capable of losing weight, and once they see that you are, they start to feel a bit insecure. This is just one theory, but I think some negative people in your life don’t want to see you succeed.
How did I deal with them?
The way I dealt with all these comments (regardless of how I felt inside) was to simply smile and say “I wouldn’t worry yourself, it’s my body and I am loving how I feel right now.”
Make it clear to them that you are happy, confident and don’t give two f***** what they say about you. They are the ones with the problem anyway.
Try to put negative comments into perspective. Do they have a legitimate concern or are they just being idiots?
I did get lovely comments too. Many people said how proud they were of me, said I looked fantastic and told me to keep it up and even asked for advice. Try to focus on these good comments and rub it in the faces of those who don’t want you to succeed!!!
Have any of you experienced comments like these?